Patents

Here are at least some of the patents held by my sister's father-in-law. Some pretty advanced stuff.

Jonathan 12/29/2004 10:12:00 AM

 
Random Thoughts from Work

Circle K’s parent company, Pantry, Inc., derives 30% of it’s merchandise sales from tobacco: nearly $352 million per year. If you believe the old claim that each cigarette takes about 7 minutes off your life expectancy and if you figure that each pack of cigarettes goes for an average of $3 a pack, then you are talking about a reduction in life of 31,253 years. That's a lot of killing. [352,000,000 / 3 * 20 * 7 / 60 / 24 / 365] If the average person lives to be 80, then you're talking about 390 FLE's, i.e., full lifetime equivalents.

Have I ever mentioned my proclivity for these types of math problems? It's what I do when I'm driving or when I'm trying to fall asleep or when I'm just bored. I love me some math.

Now that we have a world tragedy somewhere in the magnitude of 25 times worse than September 11th, maybe it’s time for the US to stop obsessing on ourselves. Once the Iraq elections are over, I think it might be time to leave.

Listening: The Wrens – Ex-Girl Collection, Wilco, and now Dick Dale - King of the Surf Guitar.

The tsunami destruction is really blowing my mind. I keep wondering what I would have done when I saw the water rushing out. It was a quiet sunny day, and then boom! a wall of water moving at the speed of an airplane hits the beach. We’ll never know how many really died because so many now sleep with the fishes.

It’s a beautiful sunrise this morning as I look out onto the mountains. We haven’t had any snow up there in like two weeks. I hope we get a good dumping soon. I am trying to decide if I want to go up on Friday, since I have the day off.

Perhaps the greatest thing I have learned in this job is how valuable the 10-K is. I would never start a business without sitting down and reading the reports of companies that I would expect to be my competitors. A lot of companies disclose a lot of information on their operating strategies in their annual reports. I find the reading fascinating. Sometimes it’s hard to tear myself away from the narrative to concentrate on the relevant financials. Today I’m learning about IP 751, a non-psychoactive synthetic derivative of tetrahydrocannabinol. I’m always interested too to see the backgrounds of the corporate officers of the companies. It seems there is a certain level at which one is expected to have an MBA. It doesn’t seem to matter from where. This gives me hope.

Jonathan 12/29/2004 08:30:00 AM

 
Congratulations!

Congratulations to my Dad who on Tuesday announced to his board that he was retiring by not later than May. He wants to make sure he's out of there before his birthday; he'll be 61. Pretty awesome, if you ask me.

He'll probably end up working again at some point and to some degree. How much, how soon, where, and what are all great topics of conversation among the rest of the family now.

Mom thinks he'll go crazy in less than six months. No way! I can do a year with one arm tied behind my back. After 17 years at the same job, I could do nothing for three years easily.

Someday.

But by 61 isn't looking so good for me right now.

Jonathan 12/23/2004 03:46:00 PM

 
Road Closed

Good thing there's no hockey, otherwise this would be a real inconvenience.

Jonathan 12/23/2004 03:42:00 PM

 
Art

I bought myself some xmas presents the other day. I couldn't resist as the colors and theme both seemed to fit. And now I can't resist making myself some well-shaken margaritas: one bottle, two days. (Just enough for one more, thankfully for me and luckily for you.) Any how - I bought this and this - one for the kitchen, one for the bedroom. (Mine are on a simple white mat with a simple black frame, about 2 foot by 3 foot or so.)

Jonathan 12/20/2004 09:20:00 PM

 
Thinking About...

...shaving my head for my birthday...

Jonathan 12/20/2004 09:15:00 PM

 
The Age of Quarterbacks

The only good thing about football for me this year is watching the quarterbacks. Wow! How many really good quarterbacks are there? Culpepper. McNabb. Manning. Brady. Favre.

Manning is having a stat-smashing year. He's going to break everyone of Marino's single season records. I believe that Peyton Manning is the smartest individual in the entire NFL.

Brady has lead his team to 24 wins in 25 regular season starts and is rolling right along tonight with a couple of rings thrown-in. Did I mention the twenty-one-in-a-row thing? Brady is a real nice mix of smarts and muscles.

Who is the most physical quarterback to ever stand under center? Culpepper's on that list. McNabb too. Add in athleticism and you have to talk about Vick as well. Yeah, ever.

Who is the best quarterback of all time in the eyes of some pretty knowledgable sports-guys like John Madden and Terry Bradshaw? Yeah, they're "on his dick" but that sure as hell says something for their caliber. Brett Favre has been amazingly consistent and consistently amazing over the past decade+. A first ballot hall of famer and Czar for Life of Wisconsin: Brett Favre.

Verily, we are living in the Quarterback Epoch. Long live the quarterback!

Jonathan 12/20/2004 08:47:00 PM

 
Brunettes

I've only once dated a blonde. Brunettes are more my thing, generally. Too often, blondes seem rather ditzy. Don't get me wrong: I won't ignore a girl just because she's blonde just like I won't pay attention to a dumb brunette. Still, I was surprised to learn that for the third year running, the Page 3 girl of the year is a brunette. A fine, young brunette.

It says she's 18, but that seems awfully young to have fake tits. Could those be real? The third picture makes me think maybe they are. Decide for yourself. Pretty hot in any case. Nice of them to throw in photos of the previous winners, eh? This one's the bustiest of the lot!

Jonathan 12/20/2004 06:20:00 PM

 
It Might Be Time

I am beginning to seriously consider the idea that it might be time for me to move again. Right now, it's just a crazy little idea, but I do want to start thinking about destinations. I have to think that the most likely thing would be to just head up to Breckenridge or Frisco or Dillon or something like that. I was looking at Anchorage a little bit. Of course, I keep talking about Boise even though I don't know anything about it.

I love the hell out of this city and state, but this city has not been good to me in terms of jobs and relationships - you know, the two things that I might primarily use to define myself as a success or failure in life. I've lived here longer than I've ever lived anywhere else; maybe that is too long.

Jonathan 12/19/2004 09:11:00 PM

 
On Theme

Cracker had a great theme going with the whole Repeater thing the other day. I left a bunch of other ideas in the comments, but I forgot one. Any time I play this, I get it stuck in my head for a day or two. Tora! Tora! Tora!

Jonathan 12/19/2004 08:31:00 PM

 
Skiing

I'm off to an alright start this season. Today was my sixth day up so far. I think I'm probably in the black on my pass once I hit around eight days.

Last weekend I skied on both Saturday and Sunday. Saturday, my sister and I went to Vail where we skied some of the first tracks of the season back in Blue Sky Basin. It was opening day for Blue Sky on a beautiful, sunny day following two days of snow. It was steep and deep. We had powder well above our boots that was pretty thick and heavy in points. It was some of the best skiing I have ever done - a top three day.

Last Sunday was also a beautiful day. I went to Keystone with Pete, Mark, and Miguelina. We got the day off to a pretty good start with runs down Mozart and then a couple of turns in the rising sun over on North Peak. As we headed back to the main mountain in search of more sun, tragedy struck.

Mark fell behind and ended up riding up the chair behind us. Peter, Mig, and I came up with a couple other folks. I was the first one off the chair and turned back to watch Peter and Mig coming down the slope. Miguelina found her board across the back of both of Peter's skis as they cleared the unloading area. She placed her hands on his shoulders momentarily and leaned around to say something to him as she passed behind. As her board cleared his skis, Miguelina momentarily put her free foot into the snow (as opposed to riding with it in the center of her board). Her foot stuck in the snow as her momentum carried her a little further down the modest ramp. I could see that she was having some sort of trouble and was about to fall. Suddenly, her leg just gave way and collapsed backwards and underneath her. At the time, it appeared to me that it was her knee or just below the knee.

She immediately exclaimed, "I broke it!" I already knew that. I saw it buckle under her and go limp. I would later learn from looking at the xray that what had appeared to be her knee giving way was actually her entire leg splintering. She broke her fibula and tibia about a third of the way up the bone. The twisting motion just broke the bones in two. Her leg giving way had actually been the leg breaking and spinning beyond what is possible for it. It was an awful, awful thing to see. I keep calling it a Joe Theisman moment: one of those awful instances where you see somebody's body succumb to forces beyond which it can handle. Awful. And all three of us saw it happen. It still makes me queasy to recall. It's even worse now that I can match what was going on under the skin to what I was seeing. Just awful.

The ski patrol was at Miguelina's side within 90 seconds or so. I had been standing near a guy with a radio when it happened, and I immediately let him know that she had broken her leg. They secured her leg and wrapped her into the stretcher sled. As they were unloading her at the emergency clinic (now probably about 15 minutes from the injury), Miguelina rated her pain on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being the worst pain she had ever felt as a 12. The docs were amazed when they saw the first xrays. They called the break, "about as bad as it gets." They could not believe that Miguelina was able to maintain any sort of sense of composure. Another doctor would later tell my brother that she had not seen anyone in roughly four years who was able to hold it together after such a "violent injury."

They doped Mig up with some serious sedative painkillers, grabbed her leg, and yanked and twisted it into a position roughly in line with how it used to be. With her leg temporarily set, they scrambled to find a surgeon in Denver on a Sunday night who could evaluate the situation. They decided to load her up with some more painkillers and directed me to drive her to Swedish Hospital 75 miles away in Denver.

They kept her overnight on Sunday and got her into the operating room on Monday. The doctors placed a hollow metal rod in from the top of her knee. They then essentially reattached her foot to her leg by securing the rod with two pins, one from each side of her ankle. The surgery was supposed to take about 90 minutes but ended up being over two and a half hours. She was originally supposed to be discharged following the surgery, but due to ongoing pain management issues, they kept her for an extra day.

I had dinner with Mig and Peter on Thursday night. Her foot was still extremely swollen. I told her she had cartoon feet because they were so round and puffy. Hopefully, everything seems funnier when on heavy pain killers. She is still in a ton of pain and her day is pretty much spent icing her leg, sleeping, and waiting until she can take the next painkiller. She has crutches, but isn't supposed to put any weight at all on it for two weeks. She is expected to make a full recovery, but her snowboarding days may be over.

This was only Mig's second day up for the season after having bought the pass. Last year, on her second day up for the season, she fell and broke her wrist and missed the entire season except for one or perhaps two spring days. $700 bucks for about four days in two years. It's a bad break in just so many ways.

Jonathan 12/19/2004 07:27:00 PM

 
Hawaiian Powder Day

I guess that 40' waves are the Hawaiian equivalent of about four feet of fresh powder. I hope they're ripping it good for the next couple of days.

I'm trying to decide whether to xmas shop or to ski this weekend. I suspect that skiing will win and many of you can wait for any meager gifts I may be able to come up with. I need to get back on the slopes after the horrific Joe Theisman scene from last Sunday. Miguelina is out of the hospital, but still in a lot of pain. Theisman, McGahee, and now Miguelina - three awful leg injuries I doubt I will ever forget seeing. It just makes my stomach churn.

Jonathan 12/16/2004 09:28:00 AM

 
December 7th

I'm trying out this blog via email for the first time. I will be interested to see how this publishes.

Anyway, it strikes me that there was once a time when today was the most memorable historic day in living history. I can't say whether November 22nd was ever more ingrained than Pearl Harbor Day, but, in any instance, September 11th prevails for now.

I'm going out after work to drink kamikazes.

Jonathan 12/07/2004 02:01:00 PM

 
Re: Dry Spell

I whined about being a born again virgin. Cracker had a couple of good points in the comments. Since no one ever leaves comments, I will assume that you don't read them either and will thus re-type them for you and thus reinforce the fact that you don't need to leave comments in the first place. Fuck.

I do wish that you would leave comments. Or send an email. Or call. Fuck you (unless you left a comment or emailed or called or came to visit or invited me to visit or couldn't afford to come and visit).

He comments, "I noticed at a party the other night why I tend not to go home with the women I want. They're all in play, and I don't like to compete for them because it generally entails having to interact with lots of dumb guys to get a shot at the chick. We're the subjects, and they're the objects (thanks Jim Goad). Even if I'm getting good signals, I still bow out of all the work and BS. This is to my detriment, and I have to change my lazy/bitchy thinking."

That is for fucking sure. For whatever reason, I feel like a relationship isn't something I should have to bargain or barter for. It should happen and be romantic and be easy and be beautiful.

No. I don't expect that situation out of any even moderately long term relationship, but that's how it should start. If it's never good -- if it never starts good at the beginning -- then what will ever sustain the relationship as the bodies and minds grow old?

So I am sure as hell not gonna fight a bunch of stupid NASCAR jox for your hand early on. Fuck that. If you can't see in two seconds that I'm better than left turns (or are they right?), then I don't even want yo' digits. Fuck you.

He further comments, "... is a dry spell really cause for alarm? Or is it just a byproduct of lame behaviors? Something else? Pussy is out there if you're just looking for pussy. The idea of suicide seems like it would be a reaction to rejection, but I would point out the decision not to leave the house is an implicit rejection of anyone you might meet. If suicide is just an admission that women aren't worth the trouble, masturbation is a better answer."

Suicide isn't the response to rejection; it is the response to hopelessness. There comes a point when you realize if the biological imperative isn't what is driving your existence, then you must question what is driving your existence. If the answer is null, then what is the appropriate response? How long can I wait for an alternate answer?

Jonathan 12/02/2004 09:11:00 PM

 
Funny Email

My brother forwarded this to me. Surely it has been making its rounds on the internet, but I had not seen it before today. I don't know if the stats are true, but they sound believable. I'm not in the mood to look them up right now. Maybe later. Maybe not. This has been editted to correct random spelling, punctuation, and capitalization. Man, who writes the first drafts of all the crap that circulates via email? Anyway...

Physicians vs. Gun Owners

Physicians:
a. The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.
b. The number of accidental deaths caused by physicians each year is 120,000.
c. The number of accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
(Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept.of Health & Human Services)

Now think about this . . .

Guns:
a. The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000.
b. The number of accidental gun deaths per year (all age groups) is 1,500.
c. The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is 0.0000188.

Statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners. [If dangerous is defined a likely to kill you. How many people to guns hurt? {Guns hurt everybody!}]

Remember: Guns don't kill people; doctors do.

Fact:
Not everyone has a gun, but almost everyone has at least one doctor. [Obviously a stupid comparison since docs have multiple patients.]

Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand!

There was another paragraph about how you should see the statistics for lawyers, but it really didn't make any sense. I guess I think it does a poor job of making a good point.

Jonathan 12/02/2004 04:46:00 PM

 
Thanksgiving

I had a great time hanging out with Vince and Mary (and everyone else) for Thanksgiving. We ate like kings and drank like gods. Not quite, but I like the line, and I reserve the right to use it with you in conversation as if I had just come up with it on the spot. (Like everything else here, really.)

It was cold and snowy as you can see from this picture of Miss Mary and I on the Pearl Street Mall in Boulder.



Wow! I'm having a heck of a month with the ladies!



One friend's girl, and one friend's mom. Something about those ladies sure made me smiley though.

Jonathan 12/01/2004 10:36:00 PM

 
'Tis the Season

My company throws a holiday luncheon instead of a Christmas party. It's two hours off campus - call it three hours to include transportation time, but still, there is work before and after. That means no booze. I'm betting there will still be punch. I think it would be funny to spike the punch with Viagra.

Jonathan 12/01/2004 10:32:00 PM